A New Normal

I started off writing this blog about seven weeks ago. I’d had a cold, was getting over it, and felt discouraged because it didn’t seem like I could keep up with life. There are so many people out there promoting their writing better than I do, turning out more stuff, and some how keeping their lives in ship shape order. I shared my insights with a friend who reminded me that my family lived at a different level than maybe other people’s families do. I didn’t understand what she meant.

She reminded me that in the past few years, we’ve gone through a lot with all our different health ailments. She took me down a long list of things we’ve survived and it took me aback. It seems, over the course of time, we’d adjusted to these things, moved the bar, so to speak. I hadn’t thought of that. She suggested I might be putting too much pressure on myself (who me??) and I should rather appreciate how God has helped us adjust to this new normal in our life, and cut myself some slack in the expectations department.

I’d thought about that phrase before. A new normal. Our normal has changed. We’ve gone from a carefree, grab a meal out here and there, spur of the moment family, to one that has to consider ever aspect of food, preparation, time and energy. We have to take a lot into consideration when planning an outing, or making a commitment. I think, even though it’s been a very hard adjustment period, we are better for it. I think. On days when I’m exhausted and just want to get takeout, I don’t feel that way so much–but we all have our moments.

So, where was I? Oh yeah…planning this blog. SO, while I’m thinking about our new normal, and health issues, I get pneumonia. Again. Weeks have gone by, and now that I’m getting my energy back, I realize I never posted my blog I’d begun so many weeks ago. Maybe I needed a refresher course? Okay, so here’s what I learned this time:

My family has learned to pick up the slack when mom is down and out. They know how to really dig in and take care of things. We’ve been here, done that, and are good to go with the flow. I don’t dig my heels in and complain when struck silly with illness, as once I did. Rather, I look and think and wonder what God might have in store for me this time. I used to rail and whine with each bout of illness that came our way, now I’m like, “huh…well, okay. We know how to do this.” I now feel fairly (notice I said fairly) comfortable telling people, “No, I can’t do that.” Because I know the limits on my energy. I don’t fear.

I liken it to fire drills. Or emergency preparedness. If you do something often enough, then you get kind of used to it. Am I comfortable being ill? Not hardly. But, I know that God will provide for our needs. He’s shown us again and again and again. When I go down, I’m not alone. He’s here, providing comfort in the sense of His being, through others, through family.

Some of my favorite passages are in Romans. One that get’s used an awful lot, found on stationary, door knockers, you name it,  is Romans 8:28 And we know in all things that God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Is that an easy platitude to give someone going through a hard time? No. I think it’s often taken out of context. First, it’s a promise to those who belong to God, His children adopted by God through our great Savior, Jesus. Second, it’s a promise that no matter what we face, if we are submissive to Him, He can take all the trials of this life and work them out to further His plans, for our good. It’s a verse I hold dear. But, put in context, it’s ever so much more powerful:

26 In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. 27 And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.  28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who[i] have been called according to his purpose. 29 For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. 30 And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.

Paul goes on to say, if God is for us, who can be against us? Who indeed.  If we belong to Him, then NOTHING can separate us from the Love of God that is in Christ Jesus.  If you haven’t read this passage of Romans completely in a while, or maybe never–please do. It’s so much more than a platitude for those hurting. There is beautiful power in the Word of God.  Here’s the link Romans 8.


Perspectives

I studied interior design in college. I had to learn very quickly to communicate my ideas visually with the class—and especially to the instructor. We learned to draw in perspective, to use vanishing points to make what was really a one dimensional view look three dimensional. I grew especially good at drawing from the top down (as if you’d taken the roof off the building and looked inside like, like taking the top off a dollhouse). But, that came with a lot of practice and many mistakes.

We recently took our first trip as a family who is limited by food allergies. Two years ago, we were not that family. We spent one year in diagnosis with my son, and we’ve had one year to adapt to a lifestyle that is not friendly to our day to day conveniences of food.  Or inconveniences—depends on how you look at it. And that is the point of my post.

We haven’t yet taken on bigger vacations, but we started with a two-day trip to a family member’s house. We made sure that the grocery stores in the area had some of the safe foods we depend upon, and then went shopping to buy everything else we needed. We packed our pans and cutting boards and utensils (we have to be that careful with his diet). I made safe snacks for the ride and had meals prepared so when we stopped we could eat.

Traveling like this does NOT come naturally to me. I grew up stopping at restaurants when we were hungry, along with the rest of the population. We now look at fast food joints like flashy rest stops. We can’t eat there—we just use their…amenities.

I’ve quit minding the wrappers and crumbles left behind from our eating in the car (our safe haven when it’s raining and there are no places to stop. Please, don’t look through the window of my car too carefully!).

I do have to admit, that on the way home, after what was really a lovely trip, I did look ever so longingly at the families heading into those cozy side spots for a nice leisurely meal—especially when it was 8PM and we still had to unpack and THEN cook dinner when we got back.

We are learning to live outside what other folks have to do. But, we are managing and beginning to see things from new angles and make new routines and habits. With practice and prayer, we are seeing advantages like listening to books on CD while we eat lunch in our car, rather than slipping on the greasy floors of a fast food restaurant (but that’s another story). God has a hand at changing our hearts, and instead of looking with dread at these challenges, I am looking at things from a new perspective.

Philippians 4: 4-7,19 Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. 19 And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.

Ener-G Foods (my new ally)

We had an ALMOST bad experience the other day.  That’s not proper English, is it?  But, that best describes it!  We have used many Ener-G brand products over the past year.  Breads, egg replacer (I prefer flax meal now–seems to make things rise better), crackers, pretzels (yummy sesame seed covered ones) and the like.  We can only get their brand through our local grocer, and the items they carry are all gluten, dairy and egg free.  So, when I glimpsed their brand on Amazon, and saw the word “donuts” I didn’t hesitate to order.  I’m not a baker (except cookies)–and when I fry foods, they often come out oily, so I avoid frying.  Anyway, my son has asked many times if gluten free, egg free, dairy free donuts exist, and until that day, I didn’t think so.  So I ordered a case immediately.  They arrived to much fan fare, and I set about opening a pack and trying one.  My husband tried one too, and said, “I taste lemon.”  So I read the ingredients, and didn’t see lemon, but DID see egg whites.    WHAT???

My son took this disappointment better than I did, but he was still sad.  I felt badly because my mistake of not reading ingredients  had nearly caused a catastrophe, and I felt I had let him down.  You hate to see your kids disappointed by something they had their hopes set high on.  Needless to say, I contacted the company and suggested they change their label, or add the word “EGG” in the title of the product, or main description.  Or at least BOLD it on the package.  When our local store carries about 20 different items by this company and NONE of them have egg or dairy, it’s a shock, let me tell you.    I gave our case of donuts to a friend whose daughter is allergic to wheat, she was very happy,  and continued to feel badly until I got my response from Ener-G.

They were very apologetic, and assured me they’d take my concerns seriously.  Their representative explained they used eggs in very few products, and they were trying to phase them out with flax meal.  Some customers didn’t like that they were phasing eggs out–it was changing the flavor of their favorite foods in a way they didn’t like, but Ener-G feels strongly about eliminating the top 8 food allergens.  They were very sympathetic too, which I didn’t expect.  Often times when I write to a company and explain how hard it is to find safe foods, they leave me with the feeling like, “well, that’s your problem, we need to make a profit.”  Ener-G is NOT that kind of company.  They seem to have an empathy for what it is like to have to consider every food item that goes into your child’s mouth as a potential hazard;  To understand that eating food isn’t something that everyone can take for granted.    And let me tell you, when a company is empathetic and listens and tries their best to help–they gain loyal customers FAST.

Ener-g is sending my son a complementary box of brownies–gluten, egg and diary free–and for that, I’m very thankful.  If you would like to contact them and support them in their complete elimination of egg and dairy from their line, you can reach them here.

That’s not cheese?

If you’ve ever shopped for a cheese replacement because of dairy allergies, you were probably as dismayed as I was to find that most all the products out there-soy cheese, rice cheese, almond cheese-contain DAIRY in some form.  Why eat those other cheeses, you wonder?  We did too.  They certainly don’t taste all that great.  And most are NOT low in fat.  That’s a mystery I still haven’t solved.  Onward and upward! I searched and searched and heard rumor of ONE company that did indeed, make a dairy free, gluten free ‘cheese’ replacement.

Yesterday, much to my joy, Daiya Cheese landed at our local health food store.  I’ve been waiting for months after reading rave reviews on the product.  Previously, they only sold commercially, and as those companies used shared machinery with wheat, we couldn’t try them out.  So, where was I?  Oh yeah, so I got the call (I was on the waiting list) and raced to the store.

Yesterday we made pizza.  My kids have been without this enjoyment for nearly a year now, and have their hopes set high on Daiya as well.  I was hesitant, but hopeful.  We made a lovely gluten free crust, layered the ‘mozzarella’ shreds and ‘cheddar’ shreds on top of one, and the same with the additional hamburger-seasoned-like- sausage on the other.  Dinner was served and I heard, “oh mom, this is so yummy!” many many times.  Today we made turkey melts, and cheese fries (not healthy, but fun) and again heard applause and, “oh mom, I’m so glad you found this!”  Nothing warms my heart more than to be appreciated!

The breakdown:  The ‘cheese’ is dairy free, casein free, cert. vegan, cholesterol and gluten free.  It’s made from tapioca flour, and a mixture of oils.  It MELTS.  I couldn’t put my finger on the flavor exactly, but my daughter did.  She said, “tastes a lot like Cheetos.”  That sums it up pretty well!

Places Part 2

I unlocked a new piece of the puzzle with my son’s allergies this week.  It’s taken a long time to get this particular piece.  He’s been having a flare up with his tummy lately (intestinal bleeding), and we couldn’t figure out what it was.  We’ve been avoiding gluten for a year, and eggs and all dairy for about nine months.  We’ve read books and articles, but there didn’t seem to be an answer.  So I’ve been praying that God would lead us to what might be causing this.  His biggest reaction happened around his birthday.  We’d had hot dogs (all organic, no preservatives, no nitrates, really expensive ones), and lunch meat (gluten free, dairy free).  His stomach was upset, but the ingredients listed in these were safe.  And then our local grocer was out of the regular chicken we buy.  So we switched brands to Tyson.  He then went on to have the worst reaction we’ve seen.  I hopped on Celiac.com web page to see if anyone else was having these problems, and several people mentioned bad reactions after eating Tyson chicken breasts, but other people were very dismissive to them, saying the chicken was gluten free, so it must have been something else.

I went to Foster Farms (our reg. brand) web page and read about their chickens.  I read that they feed their chickens corn, and sometimes the corn would turn their skin, and even feathers yellow.  Something clicked in my head.  If corn can turn their skin yellow–then it must be going throughout their system.   Like when we take vitamin B to keep away mosquitoes in the summer.  It’s not like the mosquitoes bite us and then pass on the word, “she tastes bad, don’t go there.”  They smell the vitamins in our skin.  SO, follow me for a second, if our intestines are digesting little bits of food and sending them throughout our system, it makes sense that some of that will end up in our muscle tissue.  SO, if chickens (Tyson chicken in particular are being fed “wheat and other vegetable matter”), then some of that is going to end up on our plate.

I’ve discovered that a lot of animal feed contains wheat, barley, oats (that have often been contaminated by wheat), dairy and egg.  I also discovered several sites speaking to the issue and suggesting Celiac patients and autistic spectrum people  not eat animals that are on a grain diet, and to watch out for eggs and dairy because of reactions.  Not many people seem to know about this, I sure didn’t.

Since we’ve eliminated Tyson chicken and lunch meat, his stomach has calmed down.    I’ll now have to check on other animal products–another thing on our checklist, but that’s okay.  He’s better, and that’s what is important.  I’m so thankful we’ve solved this part of the puzzle.

James 1:5  If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.


Shirataki Noodles and Cabury

I mentioned I’d be sharing about our quest for allergy safe foods for us on occasion.   It’s a challenge to find our SOLID information from companies.  It’s like they don’t want to commit all the way.  Very frustrating for people like me who want the answers clearly written in stone!  So, I contacted Shirataki Company about their products because a friend recommended them.  It took two phone calls to get the answer, but they are gluten free and vegan, so we can eat them.  I haven’t tried them out on my son yet-they are a bit crunchy and do have just the slightest touch of a tofu flavor.  Very slight, though.  I haven’t eaten them with any Italian sauces, but I did make an Asian soup and they were quite good with that.

Also, I contacted Cadbury, who make a variety of candies and (surprisingly enough) cough drops.  This is what they had to say :

“Our company complies with all applicable labeling regulations by the Food and Drug Administration and other regulatory bodies in the U.S.  In addition, we have implemented an internal food allergen management policy, pursuant to which we have undertaken the labeling of any known allergens in the following categories:  cereals (containing gluten and products of these including wheat, rye, barley, triticale, spelt, kamut, and oats, but not corn, rice, sorghum, or buckwheat), crustacea (including shrimp, prawns, crab, lobster, and crayfish), mollusks (including oysters, clams, scallops, and mussels), eggs, fish, peanuts, soybeans, milk, tree nuts, sesame seeds, and sulfites (greater than 10 mg/kg).  Accordingly, we continuously assess our products and update supplier information in order to make new or existing labels accurately reflect the presence of the listed allergens.”

They, for some reason, won’t go so far as to put that info on the package in the form of “gluten free” or “vegan”, but I think if more people asked for it, they might.